and perhaps another year wiser?
ha-wouldn’t that be great?! In all reality it’s probably “another year older, another year as a smart-ass.” That’s free entertainment for you all though, isn’t it?
Looking back on this past year, I’m STUNNED by how much my life has changed since August 2017. I didn’t have a checklist of things I absolutely had to accomplish in a year’s time but reflecting on the biggest lessons I learned, these two points were crucial in order to build my character.
Here’s what I’ve learned:
- Learning to say “no”
- Not everyone wants you to succeed – don’t let your kindness enable others to take advantage of you
“Not everyone (yes, ‘friends’ included) wants you to succeed”
I learned that building a community and surrounding myself with true, genuine friends who will continue to support you after I’ve surpassed them, is key to avoiding shallow relationships. I’ll always give others the benefit of the doubt but a third or fourth time is questionable. I’m not saying to limit forgiveness but instead to forgive always- just don’t let anyone take advantage of your kindness.
Some people struggle with seeing others succeed. Some people can’t stand to see you happy or achieve your goals. Some people always have to “one-up” what everyone else is doing. Some people can’t stay way from checking in on you, Some people steal and copy your content. They say copying is the biggest form of flattery but I still can’t say it feels good. Trust me, I know how awful it feels to have someone steal or copy content you spend so much time creating. It’s not a good feeling and honestly it’s REALLY, really awkward. So what do you do? Take those toxic people out of your life and don’t spend any more time or energy dwelling on it.
By nourishing the right relationships, I’m able to focus my time and energy into the people who make my life so special and unique. Find friends who can carry a conversation deeper than gossip. Find friends who fill your time together with laughs and tears (the good kind). Find friends who challenge you to become a better version of yourself. Find friends who will be honest with you – even if the truth is ugly. Find those friends and hold onto them, let them know you’re thankful for them and the impact their friendship makes in your life!
“Learning to say no”
Saying “no” is NOT a bad thing! Saying “no” doesn’t make you any less of a person. Be careful what you give your time to because those things become your investment and a part of who you are. Seriously-only this year did I begin saying “no” to projects, favors, events, and things I felt obligated to take part in just because I felt like “I had to.” I used to agree and say yes to everyone and any event just because I didn’t want to seem rude or offend anyone. Trying to keep up with everything I took on left me feeling so stressed, anxious, worn out and helpless. I would wake up on a Monday *blink* and it would be Friday evening. I became so consumed with crossing off a to-do list just to gain some sense of achievement and no matter how much I completed, it felt like my burden continued to get heavier and heavier. Long story short, learn to say NO for the sake of your mental health! Think about where your talents and passions are then use those to find things you can truly give 100% of your efforts to.
In short, these two highlights have helped me focus on what I truly care about and how I can best care for myself. I don’t know about you but once I started paying attention to my mental health and caring for myself, I was able to give more in return to the things I care about.
Two sayings I always have in the back of my mind:
“You become the average of the five people you hang around”
“There is always room for improvement”
Anyways, WHAT A YEAR…not to mention the resurrection of my blog. If you were subscribed to “Daily with HC” est. 2013, you deserve a prize, ha!
Looking back through photos and old posts, this entire year has been a whirlwind and I couldn’t have wished it any different. So thank you for making this year so special and following along on all these crazy adventures. You guys are the best.
Before I end this post, I want to thank everyone who has kept up with and encouraged us during Chi’s journey as he prepares to close the chapter on the Marine Corps. Many of you know about his medical board and have been so supportive through texts, visits and calls.
We are SO happy to announce that Chi will be retired from the Marine Corps!
This is GREAT, great news as this means he’ll be taken care of regarding medical, insurance and all that jazz. It has been over a long year of waiting and uncertainty but we’re finally out of the woods. Please continue to keep us in your prayers as he’s still waiting on a “get-out” date! We are so lucky to be surrounded by such an amazing community.
Happy long weekend, friends!
Currently listening: Kina Grannis – Can’t Help Falling in Love